There is a thief among us. I don't know who it is. I don't know how they do it. But I'm certain they exist.
Someone is stealing our cloth diapers.
As Exhibit A, I present to you the Happy Hempy (and yes, I'm quite aware that it is difficult to protest the "hippie" label when you have cloth diapers named Happy Hempies. In my defense, they were on sale for $8 each. But, I digress). The Happy Hempy: We had two of these - I know we did. They are a wonderful pocket diaper and definitely among my favorites. But now we have only one. Someone stole a Happy Hempy.
And if that isn't enough, I present to you Exhibit B: a missing Goodmama. (Cloth diaper mamas everywhere are gasping right now - I know, right? The nerve!) For the uninitiated, Goodmamas are fashionable, collectible cloth diapers. Yeah, collectible, like beanie babies. Some patterns and styles are highly desired and they fetch crazy prices on the resale market. You think I'm making this up, don't you? No, really, there are collectible diapers.
(Have you noticed that if I didn't digress so much, my blog would be really, really short? Well, I have one more digression, in the form of a confession: I'm not even a huge Goodmama fan - I have far better diapers that cost a fraction of the Goodmamas - but I saw a bandwagon so of course I hopped right on and bought a few. And now one is missing, and I want answers.
And along with these missing diapers, we're missing a TON of inserts. We used to have a good surplus - now we don't have enough inserts for as many diapers as we have.
How does this happen? I keep all of Jack's cloth diapers in one dresser drawer. They all get washed together, with nothing else because I use a special detergent on them. They all get dried together, either on the line outside or in the dryer. And then I trek them back upstairs to the dresser drawer.
Is there a secret vault in my dryer where they are hiding? Is someone stealing them off of the clothesline? Is this some variation of the eternal missing sock mystery?
Is there a diaper heaven?
In any event, if you see a baby running around in a tan dyed Goodmama with blue trim, flaunting a Happy Hempy, give me a call. I want to question him.